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The last thing i want to do is hurt you…..but its still on the list;)

You don’t have to like me….I am not a facebook status.

Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit ….wisdom is not putting is a fruit salad.

I like to take road less travelled…..helps me to avoid traffic

Wow now I’m a graduate…….Now thermometer is not the only thing that has degrees widout brains

I can see you checking my whatsapp status.B)

There are many things you can’t buy….but still pay for them.

Whattsapp status is loading

If i had a gun with two bullets and i was with hitler,bin laden and you[insert your ex or your enemy’s name],i would shoot you twice.

battery about to die

Urgent calls only

LOVING MIGHT BE A MISTAKE, BUT IT’S WORTHS MAKING.!

“Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart.”

Our marriage is like a workshop. I work and my wife shops.

If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it

Hey Zukerberge if you are still into acquiring internet services that people spend enormous time on ,may i suggest IRCTC.

I have decided to leave my past behind me ,so i owe you money…..sorry but I’ve moved on.

I was not busy to be online… I had just gave up on my life when I picked up this girls phone and saw my contact name as “Free Recharge”

Life is short talk fast

I started out with nothing and i still have most of it:)

I took IQ test …..results were negative

I don’t have dirty mind, I have Sexy imagination.

You treated me like an option so i left you like an choice

Your whatsapp status say’s online …..If your online then why aren’t you texting me

I am not questioning your honour. I am denying its existence.

My attitude will always be based on how you treat me.

I meditate for 20 min every morning …..It helps reduce stress of being 20 min late for everything

Galileo:Great mind…Einstein:genius mind…Newton:Extraordinary mind….Bill gates:brilliant mind…..ME:Never Mind.

“To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.” – Bruce Lee

The things you are Passionate about are NOT random, they are your Calling.

“Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.” – Voltaire

Failure is always temporary, only giving up makes it permanent.

whatever your thinking and feeling today is creating your future.

“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way you carry it.” ― Lou Holtz

I became a specialist at comedic one-liners.

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Ryun

“Excersize is like mouthwash, if you can feel the burn it’s working”

WISDOM is the gold refinement of life

‘Work until you don’t have to introduce yourself ‘

“To shine like the sun, you need to burn like one.”

I did lots of stupid things on social networking sites but atleast i never commented “Cute pic dear “on girls profile picture

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

I like to always carry two sacks around. That way, if someone asks me to lend them a hand, I can say, “Sorry, got these sacks”.

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

You’re eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean and baby, I’m all lost at sea.

“Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love”

love is when you feel totally complete

If I know what love is, it is because of you!!

“You can be Han Solo. And I’ll be Boba Fett. I’ll cross the sky for you.”

I love the passion between us

All you need is Love

Love is letting go of fear

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness

I haven’t slept for 10 days, because that would be too long.

Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.

Dear Mario…..I Wasted My Childhood Trying To Save Your Girlfriend.Now, you help me to save mine.

God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me.

Just wanted to say, you are as useless as “ueue” in a “queue”.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather….not screeming and yelling like his passengers in car.

Going for Aerospace Engineering. Meri future GF ko bohat space milega

You know you’re ugly when it comes to a group picture they hands you the camera.

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened.

I knew, I was born to be a pessimist. Because My blood group type is B Negative

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong

Why is “abbreviation” such a long word?

“You don’t know anything about pain until you’ve seen your own baby drowned in a tub… and you definitely don’t know anything about how to wash a baby.”

Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software…it’s called #Monday, please fix it

When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start looking like nails

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

The “Night Out” ever…… but I don’t know why they took me to police station. Am I Famous??

Life is short talk fast

Always remember you are UNIQUE………… just like everybody else.

Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.

“And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.”

Falling in love is only half of what I want. Staying in love with you till forever is the other.

Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.

“I know he’s a player, but I want to be the girl that he hangs up his jersey for and leaves the game”

Status under construction.No status available

Life is short, chat fast..!!!

Life is too short to be updating status

Too busy to update a status. 0_o

formula for sucess…….under promise and over deliver…….

since 1910

Life is too short. Dont waste it copying my watsapp status….

I wish I had google in my mind and antivirus in my heart.

Keep moving! Nothing new to read…

Don’t be happy.I don’t Really forgive people,I just pretend like it’s ok and wait for my turn to destroy them.

Error: status unavailable

Waiting for wi-fi network.

Jidhar apna CRUSH hai , udhar hich sala RUSH hai and filhaal timepass k liye only CANDYCRUSH he.

One person’s LOL is another’s WTF!

I don’t care what people think or say about me, I was not born on this earth to please everybody.

Not always available, try your luck 😉

Second chances are for loosers….either we do it in first place or live it for others.

Even romeo went from being “in a relationship” to “it’s complicated”.

Sorry vegiterians we can’t pretend

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”

‘Women are cursed, and men are the proof.’

”We see all beautiful and colorful things in dis world from our BLACK n WHITE eyes!”

Love means exposing yourself to the pain of being hurt by someone you trust.

Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell.

It only hurts when you love someone and you know they don’t love you back.

Don’t mind the weather, it’s raining in my heart tonight

I don’t think we love each other in the same way. And…I think keeping you near me, would destroy me.

The shattering of a heart when being broken is the loudest quiet ever.

Happiness is when “Last seen at” changes to “online” and then to “typing..”

I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here

I’m listening. It just takes me a minute to process so much stupidity all at once!!

Don’t talk out loud, you lower the IQ of the whole street’

You are the product of 4 billion years of evolution, now fucking act like it.

I’ll try being nicer if you start being smarter.

I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

I’ve been too fucking busy and vice versa

Life is too short. Dont waste it removing pendrive safely.

READ MORE :-  1000+ Whatsapp Status Collection 2015

I wish i could trade my heart for another liver …..so that i can drink more and care less

Intelligence is like underwear. It’s important that you have it but there’s no need to show it off.

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.

Coins Always Make Sound But The Currency Notes Are Always Silent! ?that’s why i’m always Calm & Silent

Stop checking my status ! Go Get A Life 😛

A rolling stone gathers no moss… But if I stop the stone then it still takes a long time for the moss to grow.

I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!

Everything that kills me makes me feel aliv

I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition 😛

“Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude.My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!”

When you feel insulted I’m just describing you.

Xcuse me..I found something under my shoes. .ohh its your Attitude.

Love is that state of mind when a karan johar film becomes bearable

im cool but global warming made me hot

When i am good i am best , when i am bad i am worst.